My First Thai Massage Experience

I have heard a lot about the Thai massage , and to be honest it did not sound to relaxing. When I think of a massage, I think of the sound of waves through speakers, and a dim-lit room smelling of nice aromatic oils.

No I did not just think up this wonderful vision, I have had a few weekends away in a spa retreat and experienced this wonderful, relaxing experience.

There am I, sitting in a big heavy expensive towelling dressing gown, sitting, no lying on a recliner beside a nice heated indoor swimming pool, the occasional tea candle flickering in the dimness ahh nice.

So my experience and the above wonderful expectation I enjoyed by the pool, was in my thoughts as I approached the Thai massage school near my home in Hang Dong. Its near the Hang Dong Police station and came highly rated.

So Nui and I went to the school and the first thing I saw were a few young Europeans sitting outside. There was a little coffee shop to the side of the place and I was not sure if they were just finished with a massage or students of the school.

We went to the girl at the reception and told her that we wanted a massage each, and while I was waiting , sitting on a seat, I was eaves dropping and hear several different accents, all speaking english , from the group, well 4 to 5 or so, men and women outside the coffee shop.

My good lady Nui, had found out the price of a massage, for an hour and a half, to be the grand price of BHT 300 ( Around £3.70 or $5.70)

It was a few minutes say 10 or so, when a lady came down and presented Nui and myself with a washing bowl and a pair of flip-flops ( Thongs to my US cousins ) we took our shoes off and had our feet washed, or we washed them , mmmm I thing we washed them come to think of it. Anyways, my feet nice and cleaned I went to put my feet into my flip flops, mmmm a problem they were far too small. Nui, well, her flop flops were a perfect fit, so we were directed to a door in front of us and then to a set of stairs leading to the first floor.

Now, have you ever tried wearing flip-flops several sizes too small?, no? well let me tell you, it’s not a pleasant experience. My feet were well over the sole and when I tried to squeeze my toes into the straps, I could just about do it. The soles of my feet were half covered by the thin plastic soles while the sides of my feet were in contact with the stairs as I hobbled up each step.

I can hear you say, as you read this, why not complain, why not ask for a bigger pair, mmm, well I asked for a bigger pair, but alas, my size ten feet ( 40.5 for US , 44.5 for EU & 29 for Japan) were too big, and I had to cope with what I was given.

So up the stairs I went, dirtying my nice clean feet, well, the outer part of my feet, and we were taken into a nice long room. It was dim, quite and had a nice aromatic smell. Mmmm good I thought, just what I expected.

I could see about 10 flat mats on the floor, all laid out , nice and ordered, left to right under the windows. I could see in the far right corner, a gentleman lying face down and a lady putting all her weight onto the heals of her hands and leaning on his leg, mmmm interesting.

We were ushered to individual cubicles, and handed a top and a pair of trousers, the looked like pyjamas, loose-fitting and, well to be honest I was wondering if it was big enough for me to get into, taking into consideration their flip-flop, ad hock measurements. I went into the cubicle and too my clothes off and put the trousers on, they had a cord, just like the pyjamas of old, except, thank goodness the hole where your “privacy” would keep popping out. ( Good for all those around as well.)

Then it came to putting my top on, now it had a v neck slit and you had to put it on over your head. As I mentioned before, I am not a slim man, (Although, I would like to add, I was a decade ago) and I was struggling, it was a bit snug and I was grunting as I wriggle my way int the top, unable to grab the side as my arms were up straight in the air, and I wanted to ease the top down my chest. I was so glad I was behind some walls as there would have been a few chuckles made at my expense.

I would like to add that Thais being the polite people they are would not have chuckled in front of me, but would have made remarks, in Thai, and have a good giggle after I had left or out of sight. I have mentioned before about Asian Face, and even though I am not asian , they would still not disrespect me by laughing in my presence, especially as I am a paying customer.

So after a struggle I managed to get into my top, and even though I was struggling to get into it , I was surprised that there was still enough room for comfort.

So out of my cubical I go, and was given a key and shown to a small locker in the same room. I put my clothes into the locker and then made my way to my mat.

I as instructed by a nice lady, dressed the same as the other members of staff ( I can’t spell masseuse ) to lie down on the mat and relax.

So I lay down and with the nice aromas in my nose and the quietness around I relaxed.

For those of you people out there who have never had the pleasure of a Thai massage, it started ok and then the lady started to press down on my legs, muscles and using her weight press, push and bend my legs, arms and back. I would not call it pleasurable, even though at time it definitely was, but it was not what I expected.

At times I felt as if i was in a wrestling match, and I was the weaker contestant. The massage continued when I was asked to lie on my front, my legs were pressed to the side, one at a time, knuckles, elbows and fingers working their way into my tight and stiff muscles. At times I would give a little grown, as she found a particular stubborn muscle knot. This, I may add was is great contrast to my good lady half, who was repeatedly saying ” Ooooohh” ” Greattttt” and “Niceeeee”
This was even though she asked for the ‘Hard” treatment, and I was on the soft one. Take into account when her legs get sore from work in the UK, she has me standing on her legs and back to relieve her knots, and I am not a light person .

This went on for the hour and a half, and I was , at the end very relaxed, as all my knots and muscles were unlocked and I felt a lot better.

A Thai massage is a wonderful thing and guaranteed to free you from those stress knots.

I was later told my good lady that my masseuse as a “Katoy” ( Thai for ladyboy) now before your mind goes into overdrive and thinks of all the stereo types seen on the tv , no she is a normal lady living a normal life.

It did, however, explain why she was so strong , and her fingers and grip was so good.

Si , in brief, have a proper Thai massage, in a real massage school, and be careful of places that offer a Thai massage, as a lot of them also offer “Happy endings”


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